This is a philosophical statement. It is intended to spark thinking and examining.
Ever used the phrase, when discussing the actions of another person, “I just don’t understand it”? Maybe with a guttural exclamation before it, one of disgust?
I think we mostly use that phrase in a pretty pejorative manner. It’s a great way of being dismissive. It says “if I, as an intelligent, aware, well reasoning individual cannot figure it out, then clearly it must be that their position and their actions are wrong, delusional, and hysterical.”
And who knows, that could be true.
Lately though, I’ve purposefully taken on relating to that phrase in a very literal manner. In that, it’s true, I really don’t understand… in the same way that I don’t understand a lot of other things. Such as quantum mechanics, or how the gall bladder works, or why certain movies continue do well at the box office.
Which means I can learn and can work to understand it.
We are all blessed with our own little pocket of reality that we carry around with us, fashioned from what we’ve experienced, from where we grew up and what we’re surrounded by, and especially from our decisions along the way. We are all delightfully complex little bundles.
And everything we do in life makes sense inside of our little personal pockets.*
If so goes I in the world, then so too goes others. When I don’t understand, I can explore, I can ask, I can listen, I can imagine others complexly, and I can see what’s the context that would have them be the way they are being.
Like a good book, it can only broaden my views on the world and on others.
In the end, I may not – and likely will not – take on the whole of their world view, and I might still recommend different courses of actions. But my little bubble may shift. I may see things newly, or see things I’d never paid attention to before. And inside the space of understanding, there’s new openings. For listening. For creating. For solutions. For reconciliation. For freedom.
Inside the spaces of understanding, we can drive towards what it is we all want.
* Which is why it’s super helpful to have another get an ‘outside view‘ when we’re looking to explore and examine our lives. Things are super immediate to us and our thoughting gives us the ready, right, answers. It takes an outside view to help break those bubbles. **
** What’s really great is if we notice (with or without another’s help), that something we consistently do doesn’t seem to make sense to our conscious self, we then know that there’s something hidden behind the scenes that’s causing us to behave that way. And that’s always where the juice is, always where the biggest transformations can happen, when we unconceal the hidden factors and can own, complete, and transform them.